so many, many reasons

The Storyteller's Gala went well this weekend! And a lot of its success was in part thanks to me, I say with no small amount of pride.

I acquired over $1,200 in contributed items for the silent auction, I did almost all if the decorating, I helped set up the silent auction tables, I performed in two pieces at each of the three shows, I kept an eye on the food and wine and replenished both as necessary, I mingled and chatted with the guests, and I was one of only two dancers who stayed until almost one in the morning to help with the clean-up.

All of this, I might add, while a snowstorm was raging across the area and my car decided to die.

I might have slept until almost noon two days in a row as a result.

I love my life.

'tis the season to be jolly and joyous

I am so glad it's finally December, because I always spend November being upset by the sudden blast of Christmas music, sales, and decorations. I can't stand that the corporate world just skips right over Thanksgiving. My family never started the Christmas season before December, and that's the way I like it.

Now, though, I can unleash the Christmas beast. I can finally listen to Christmas music. I covered the tree outside my house in fairy lights yesterday (first time I did that by myself!) and I think it looks excellent. And soon I will be breaking out all the great Christmas movies, including Muppet Christmas Carol, Love Actually, Elf, and Little Women.

(If you don't understand why little women is a Christmas movie, you have no soul.)

hate to see her go but love to watch her leave

I will admit, I have been shamefully behind on most things in life. But there's no time like the start of the holiday season and the end of the year to remind me to get my butt in gear. So, without further ado, I return to our Lessons in Lingerie!

Part IV. The Great Panty Mystery

Unlike bras, most women know what size panties they do or do not fit into. And yet, there are still a million questions to do with panties, such what to wear with that dress or skirt, what do all those different names mean, what exactly is VPL, and how the heck do you fold them?

So, to begin, here's a quick run down on the basic types on panties most of us encounter.

1. The Bikini

Probably the most common type of panty out there. Moderate coverage in both back and front, which means a lot more than a thong and quite a bit less than a brief. The rise is usually somewhere around the hips and the sides are usually high cut. Comes in a few varieties, such as string or low-rise, which affect how much coverage there is on the thighs and lower abdomen. Good to wear under heavier fabrics like denim or corduroy.

2. The Brief

The traditional (read: high) rise panty with full coverage in the rear and generally a wide band over the hip. Once relegated to the category of granny panties, they are now making a comeback is beautiful silks, laces, and microfibers, making them perfect to wear under skirts that you want a little more coverage with, or with high-waisted pants when you want a little more abdominal support.

3. The Boyshort

Cute and classy at the same time. These generally have a low rise (around the hips) that is similar to the waistline of a bikini but offer more back coverage and come lower on the hips. Perfect under just about anything, especially as they are easy to find in seamless microfiber that will disappear under light-weight clothing for those of you who don't like wearing thongs. I also think they make great pajama bottoms. They can also be found in "cheeky" styles that show off a little more in the back, but as with anything cheeky watch out for VPL!

4. The Thong

Dreaded by some and loved by others, the thong has a triangular front panel, minimal side coverage, and almost nothing in the back to guarantee no lines under clothes. Comes in different varieties, such as those with wide waistbands versus the G-string (aka, the bum-flosser). Even those who swear by them have to take a little while to get used to them. But keep reading, I have great news for you. There's a thong out there you won't even know you are wearing...

5. The Tanga

A European import. Provides moderate to minimal coverage in front, usually full side panels, and the back coverage in between a bikini and a thong. Always cute, but generally one of those "cheeky" styles you have to be careful of under certain clothes.

6. Shapewear

A fabulous invention, and one that no women of any size should ever be ashamed of using. How do you think those Hollywood ladies stay in those slinky runway dresses? They all have their Spanx on underneath. Today's shapewear is a whole different beast from the girdles of yesteryear. Designed to put even pressure on all surfaces, rather than constricting certain areas, it can tuck, reduce, or simply smooth your anything from the waist down whenever you want a little extra help.

So, now that you all have the basics of what is what, it's time for some specifics. There are two things to keep in mind when selecting panties for every outfit. First, as always, how does it make you feel? And second, how is it making you look?

Your panties should always be something you are comfortable in, both physically and mentally. If wearing a certain style makes you feel nervous or uncomfortable, don't wear it. There are others out there. Not to say that you shouldn't try new things, you definitely should! Just make sure that what you end up with makes you happy and comfortable. And your comfort will be increased by knowing that they make you look good. If elastic is pinching, if the cut is dividing your bum into fourths, if something is riding up where it shouldn't, or if you know that you have VPL (visible panty lines)... you won't feel good. So make sure you have a panty for every pant, skirt, or dress, and do a quick rear-check before you leave the house. I promise, you'll feel better throughout the day knowing how fabulous you look every time you leave a room!

The ease with which you can find the right panty for the right outfit will be affected by (gasp!) organization. I am a firm believer in organized lingerie drawers (very few other things in my life get this attention). I believe that bras should be stored stacked side by side and nestled in each others' cups (to prevent any wrinkling or missshaping from occurring), that socks should be kept in a separate place (you know your socks take over whatever space you put them in), and that you should be able to see every panty you own at one go. How many of you lay your panties on top of each other, and then go crazy before work in the morning tearing through them trying to find the one that you need for the skirt you already picked out and end up leaving everything in a mess and still lacking the panty you wanted? (I see more than a few guilty hands out there!)

So I am going to solve your problem for you. The best way to fold a panty is in a little square.

1. Hold it with the front facing you.
2. Fold both sides back to make a rectangle (ish) shape
3. Fold the bottom up (may have to do this twice) to make a square

Voila! And the best part? This works for thongs too! Now, instead of throwing those little bits of string and lace into a crumpled up mess on the side of the drawer, you store them (overlapping, like fish scales) for easy-to-see decision making with all the rest of your pretty little squares.
Isn't that better?

And now, speaking of thongs, I will finish with this amazing bit of information... There is a thong out there that you will love. Yes, you. You, who think you are too old for thongs. You who think they are all uncomfortable bits of floss. You, who think there's no point in trying one on. And you, who already wears nothing but thongs daily. It is the thong for everyone. And it is...

The original thong, the Hanky Panky. Seriously, you will love this little beauty. When I was working at Bella, I saw everyone from middle-aged women who swore that thongs were only for trashy teenagers to long-standing thong devotees leave with ten of them in their bags swearing they would never wear anything else. It is literally that comfortable. You can get it in original cut

or low-rise

Want to know the secret? Se those pretty, wide panels of lace on the sides? They're made with special elastic that pulls away from your body, instead of pressing in, so the whole things lies smooth and doesn't move anywhere it shouldn't. Seriously. It's amazing. Go try one. And not one of the knock-offs. Buy the real Hanky Panky. You'll be glad you did.

and now she's gone in the blink of an eye

I'm not quite sure where I've been this past week... It hasn't been inordinately busy, but I suppose it felt as if it were.

I got up early this morning to pick up a paycheck (yay!) and then spent a half hour or so emailing my senators about the health care debate. I love being politically active.

Also, Saturday was girls' night out with the roomies (and my friend Alex, who is not a girl, but is a lot of fun). I had to leave earlier than I wanted to in order to be up to babysit on Sunday morning, but it was still a great night.

{my awesome new roommates}

{Alex and me. Luckily the photo is too small for you to see the lovely curling iron burn on my shoulder. It's been there for days and does not want to go away. Also, I just noticed I look rather naked. I was wearing a strapless shirt, I promise!}

And if you're starting your holiday shopping early/searching anything on the internet, you can do so and help out my theatre company at the same time!

At iGive.com, up to 28% of your online shopping will be donated.
At iSearch.com, $.01-$.02 will be donated to Deviated Theatre for every search you do.
At Elemental Threads, use the offer code DevaitedTheatre when you make purchases in December and 10% of your purchase will be donated!

but underneath it all there's more more more

Yesterday, when I got home from taking Brian to the bus stop after a lovely lovely visit, my roommates had on "Twilight." I didn't have much else to do, so despite finding the books rather nauseating (I gave up on the first one after about five pages, the writing was so terrible) I settled down to watch with them.

And all I can say is... I don't understand.
I really don't understand what all the fuss and love and fangirling is about. I thought the movie was terrible, first of all, in terms of quality. But what most baffles me is... who reads these books and watches this movie and idolizes that sort of relationship? Who wants their daughters reading these books and watching that movie and idolizing that sort of relationship?

Now, don't get me wrong. I understand completely that everyone needs their trash. Everyone needs some sort of mindless brain candy, and that's nothing to be ashamed of. My boyfriend (I'll admit it) plays World of Warcraft. I read romance novels. I have friends who can't get enough of Dan Brown books.

But when you think about it... those aren't bad trash. They're silly or poorly written or historically inaccurate, but they don't idealize bad things. I may find hardcore WoWers (of which I am glad my boyfriend is not one!) a bit creepy, but the worlds and characters of fantasy games value honor and courage. We could certainly use more of those virtues in our lives. Romance novels are complete fluff, I admit it freely, but they also idealize independent, thoughtful women who don't want to settle for anything less than true love and absolute loyalty and sex that means something. Those are standards I think every woman should live by. And while Dan Brown is such a formula writer that you can practically match up plot development by page number between his books, his characters win in the end through knowledge and learning, which is something I think everyone should value.

I would never, on the other hand, want my children looking at a creepy, stalkerish, borderline abusive relationship, one in which the female is no longer a main character in her own story once she gets married and has a kid, and thinking "Wow, that's perfect!" But that, as far as I can see, is what the Twilight series presents. Last year Abigail went through the first book and analyzed it (for a paper she was writing) based on the nationally recognized red flags of an abusive relationship (such as controlling tendencies, victim blaming, threatening behavior, etc.) and every single one of them was present in Edward's treatment of Bella.

So my question is, what is the appeal? And why are people so okay with their daughters loving these books, and Edward, to death?

if you can't have love you dream

My schedule keeps me from reading for pleasure as often as I would like, but I can still get through a hefty novel every few days. And I like them in all shapes and lengths and genres. Somehow, though, my mental list is blank. I'm finishing up The Once and Future King right now, but after that I have no thoughts on where to go.

So, lovely readers, I turn to you for suggestions. What book would you absolutely recommend I pick up next?

Also, antibiotics = far far worse than surgery.
How much sense does that make?
(Don't even ask what the painkillers they gave me did to my system. I gave up on those after one pill. I can deal with pain much better than I can deal with every single side effect under the sun.)

oh you know you wanna be where i am

I completely intended to be putting up Halloween pictures today. But that's not going to happen because my camera that is actually Brian's because I don't have one of my own is far away from where I am.

Why, do you ask? Because I am currently back in bed in my old room in my parents house.

No, I did not get evicted already. (Although I did only just remember on Saturday that, hey, it's the 31st and I need to pay rent.) But I did get two wisdom teeth out this morning. Sans anesthesia. That's right. Just a little topical numbing and a few of those terrifyingly giant, the sight of which made me want to cry like a toddler shots into my gums and they popped those things out.

I am relying on pride in my toughness to comfort me in the painful hours between when the numbness wears off and when I am allowed to have my pain-killers.